She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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