That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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