Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
