: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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