bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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