i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
