Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
