Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
