I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
