yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Randomize
