the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
