all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
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