Nicole vs. Life
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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