This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I party with great urgency now.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
