How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
