I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
