I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize