I want to stick my p in your. b.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
