She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
A bitchslap is in order.
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