I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
