For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
