Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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