You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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