Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
