p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
