Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize