Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize