so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
