I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
