i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Less talking, more tequila
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
