He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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