I wannas sexs uuuuu
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Randomize
