Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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