I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
