Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
This is my gift to your gina
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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