I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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