don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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