How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize