quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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