OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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