Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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