I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize