remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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