let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Randomize
