Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
