I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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