The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
