Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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