we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
