Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
